The 11 Stages of Touring Spouse Separation

Patrick has been gone nearly four months. Wow, that’s hard to fathom. However, his home-coming is upon us!! Still, I have realized that during those months, I went through several stages of coping with his departure. It’s never easy saying goodbye and it’s even harder living day-by-day adjusting to them not being there.

Stage 1: Saying Goodbye

Chances are you are going to put on a happy face when you drop your musician off at the terminal. After all, you have to be supportive. Plus, you are genuinely happy that they get to live their dreams.


Stage 2: the Break Down

But nothing prepared you for the feels when you drove away and they disappeared from your sight.


Stage 3: Settling

The first few weeks, you are getting into a new groove of not having your husband around, and you realize just how un-exciting it is without them.


Stage 4: Superior

But then someone asks you how you feel about your husband being gone all the time. Being the supportive wife you are, you act like it’s no big deal.


Stage 5: Denial

However, there is still that little knot in your stomach that tightens when you think about how much you miss them.


Stage 6: School Girl

You start getting antsy about their Skype calls, just like a school girl. But alas, the timezone changes makes you wait even longer.


Stage 7: Social Lethargy

When group of people ask you to hang out with them and you realize you haven’t been out without your other half in a while.


Stage 8: Courage

You then realize, that this is a good opportunity for you to make new friends and decide to take the dive.


Stage 9: Back to Boredom

Still when you come home, you have nothing better to do while you wait for the time zones to align in a way that you can Skype. The lives of your favorite fictional characters become your passtime, so much so you have become a bit of an addict.


Stage 10: Count Down Syndrome

Everyone now knows that he will be returning in a matter of days, because you excitedly keep telling them over and over.


Stage 11: the Return of Musician

Once he is back in your arms, you swear you will never let him go back out again–knowing full well that you will.



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